1. |
40 Mansions
05:12
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40 mansions, up in flames
we’re all here waiting for someone
to beat off the blame
40 stables, wood and steel
but where are all the horses?
well, I freed them
I know how they feel
I stole the wand from your golden baby hands
I stole the wand
for it looked like a battlefield to me
40 lovers had she
in a year
how could we do that too
in the middle of a crime zone like this?
daughter of a Medici
couldn’t keep them all near
I made a bomb from your golden contraband
I made a bomb,
for it looked like a battlefield to me
but I will stay if they say go
I stay with things I know
I’ll follow the summertime in my ear
and I’ll hide my bone and jade
they do not burn, they don’t decay
I’ll fan these flames away, these flames away
you can have your
you can have your
you can have your
rainy day…
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2. |
Mosquito In The Shade
05:57
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In this blade of starlight
In this maze of the night
As they roll on by,
not a thing in the world you can do
You belonged here once
Made a fortune and drank
‘til the lady showed her spades –
Mosquito in the shade
In this teal-crazy room
By this rude and obscure foreign moon
Maybe true was false
Maybe I was the only thing left to do
Make a monster of me…
I will roll my hand in it,
take what the Gods say I’m due
Mosquitoes drink it blue
Maybe all those shapes will reappear
as they fade to grey
But I assure you,
in the darkness, dear
I smell you
far, far away
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3. |
White Cedar
05:25
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The maid of honor took my flowers away
as the stately processional of brass was almost done
the wide white billow of my lady’s goods behind me –
my parachute, your starter gun…
They cabled all the elders, saying “bring your genealogy”
we’ll cleave them all together, ‘fore the seventh blessing’s sung
Set a canopy to Eden, a bag of grain to ground us
some leverage for the rising sun
Oh Father, the neighborhood
said the labors would be easy
and the cradles would be grand
I’ll grow him the finest wood
if they’ll nail us in white cedar
when they lay us in the sand
Back in Cavalry Falls,
I laid ‘em good, split them all like peas
I was sweeter than Madeleine
and I’d chart the sky through Gaudi’s mezzanines
But of them all, the star I chose to guide me
led him here, just in time, that year
Oh and the seasons go…
Oh and the seasons go…
Oh Father, the neighborhood
said the labors would be easy
and the cradles would be grand
I’ll grow him the finest wood
if they’ll nail us in white cedar
when they lay us in the sand
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4. |
Dream Gasoline
05:54
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Jessica knows her Maybelline blues
from her red toes
She knows to hide from the violet haze
when the tank blows
Oh I can be reasonable
I can be mean
sometimes I tell her the things that I’ve seen
but lately her windows weren’t looking too clean
and I froze
A man from Fruili’s been coming
to tend her tomatoes
As high summer wobbles,
I watch
as they unroll the green hose
Oh I could nosy,
I could come clean
but I can be so many things that I’ve seen…
get me a camera, please
I want to study that pose
Shame into sadness
goes bland into madness
shock-wave of a seven-fold scream:
dream gasoline
A tavern in England,
a beach in Antibes
and the royal robes
A queen down the Nile
with her Cairo of thieves
on a sun-dialed probe
Sometimes she mistakes these things for her home
but mostly, the memory is all that you own
I’d like to offer her up my old throne
and I’ve tried…
she just cried
Shame into sadness
goes bland into madness
shock-wave of a seven-fold scream:
dream gasoline
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5. |
Opiate Cheer
02:53
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In the deep footprint of the lovers’ chair
in a back room bar
In the sweep of the fashion hair
on a golden movie star
In the grain of mahogany
and her wax veneer
In the web of the long grey hair
on a drunkard’s ear
I could never see anything else
I could never see anything else but you and me
In the shape of the paddle-boat wake
on the Green Street pond
In the drip of coconut milk
on a brown palm frond
In the sound when a stadium roars
with the opiate cheer
In the fist of a winning hand
when the ball rolls clear
I could never see anything else
I could never see anything else but you and me
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6. |
Rain In Calgary
07:56
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You’re holding up the Rhine
You're holding up the Rhine again
but you smell like the rain
in Calgary
In the bed of Aaron lies
trace of a perfect thigh
one tear
from the steel grey eye
of a Slavic soul
What was her chair in Aaron’s tomb
now guards a bright alabaster room
a shady Brigadoon
for Bluebeard’s brides…
Some choose erosion
as the beast to eat their heart away
I’d take implosion
over dissolution any day
but I’d change my mind
for one who’d lock me in that way
hey hey hey
You’re holding up the Rhine…
All the lines I see from here,
they curve and they disappear
like Julia, in her last disguise
as a Russian tease
Everything he says sounds clear,
but oh, it’s his grace they fear
I would recommend she run from here
if he moves his eyes
Some take the ocean for its
windy, leeward Adelaides
Some hold the landing
as they pray for a tide
that comes and stays
All my life
I’ve wanted earth and sea both ways
hey hey hey
oh Calgary man
save the best years of your life this way
oh Calgary man
say you’ll meet again some day
Into her arms, the battle of the confidences rages –
out of the hole in your heart
You’re holding up the Rhine…
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7. |
Gingerbread
07:18
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Well I would take the bane of logic
for my few imperfect fears
I would trade the broad blue ocean
for seven four-square years
In the chaos high above me
is a squirming dragonfly
Would someone please release her
from the never-ending sky?
Oh could you give three reasons
why a man should leave his wife
for a pocketful of treason
on a beautiful warm night?
Did she say “I love you?”
Were her eyes all wild and clear?
Was she thinking of you
when my body disappeared?
Oh baby oh baby
if it hurts so – look away
Oh baby oh baby
if it hurts so – look away
(go stand in line,
it’s easy to look away…)
Last radiator season
in that wicked time of year
A cavalry of mannequins was
standing ear to ear
Right outside our window,
as the sun began to rise
I swear I saw the chainsaw
come and roll them to the skies…
But all the laser in the world won’t
burn the lace from the girl
and her bedbound fame
The cataclysm whirls,
one more matriarch in pearl
trades her holy name
oh lead me on, this god is strong –
I hear they bathe you and scrape you
they bathe you and scrape you
‘til the world is gone…
In the cupboard of our kitchen
hangs an ordinary knife
but it’s Gueneviere’s good silver
if you twist it to the right
(slow turning, slowly burning)
So I leave you all the candy
on those ladies’ magazines
(yeah, I make good cake, pie, cup o’ tea,
but it’s not what I had in mind originally)
you can take the gingerbread house
leave me all the pinks and greens
Oh baby oh baby
if it hurts so – look away
oh baby oh baby
if it hurts so – look away
(go stand in line,
it’s easy to look away…)
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8. |
Chevalier Lune
03:48
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Somewhere on the eastern curve of your ball
I’m told there’s a casino at sea
where numbers are dealt in the tidal roulette
by a host from a far galaxy
oh Moon, Chevalier Lune,
expatriate grey in the sky…
oh Moon, seduced and perfumed,
have you campsites for Junegirls,
for Junegirls in flight?
Oh mocker of maidens, you steely-eyed squire
when you tire of your orbital view
I will throw you the shadow of a love-sick tycoon
who taught me not to gamble on you
He promised me either a cosmic bouquet
or some Andalusian range
I wanted only to peel your circumference
but the blade that I saved is sharper today
oh Moon, Chevalier Lune
oh Moon, Chevalier Lune
you were nothing to me
but a white hemisphere
I offered you only my breath in your ear
you were nothing to me
but a white hemisphere in the night
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9. |
In This House
05:43
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All my guardian evils stayed away,
the white town steeple rang the day in –
stable agents for this love of mine
And the gate far beyond the farm,
the tall scarecrow’s long straight arms –
cantilevers for this love of mine
But in the garden Eden changes,
she realigns and rearranges
all the poisons in the trees
and the apple that she leaves for me is
bitten by some blinded weevil –
all the things I thought were evil
fall down around me now,
they cage this sacred vow
In this house, I promised I would give you 50 years
In this house, I go from embers to tears,
In this house, oh say you love me
Marry me here, marry me here
Here, in the castle walls,
though standing armor clash and fall,
I shield you from my maverick eyes
Oh I always knew,
maybe find a less strange bird than you,
but I could not hold him to this curving vine
And it would take all my wages
to buy up all the world’s black pages
that tell me you should leave me now,
residue of wisdom on your brow
But if it takes this to remind us
better take love where it finds us…
Faith and reason lied,
will mercy mercy mercy be denied?
In this house, I promised I would give you 50 years
In this house, I’ve gone from embers to tears
In this house, oh say you love me
Marry me here, marry me here
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10. |
Dancing Past Elysium
06:43
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when the only eye you have is blind
and the only thing left in your mind
is the fantasy you can’t forgive
and the love she left you with…
and her ballroom dress still spinning ‘round
and your tongue in pieces on the ground
and you can’t anticipate the sound
of the love she left you with…
you start to find things where they weren’t before
souvenirs of bodies you adored
and they follow you through open doors
to the cold – I wish you would
oh my darling, what I’d like to do
is to take a little piece of you
do you think that you could lend me two?
for a day? I wish you would
with any luck we’ll roll past Elysium
colonize some dirty town
with any luck we’ll roll together
the long way down
oh, by morning
in the middle of Hell, the lakes will
look like swimming holes
and the farther we get from the border of Heaven
those gates’ll look like bunions on our souls
with any luck we’ll roll past Elysium,
colonize some dirty town,
with any luck we’ll roll together,
the long way down
I begged your hands to gore me
but I didn’t know you’d let me wait so long
we were a bore but the Styx it roared
like the Rio Rio Rio Grande
oh in the matter of time it takes to be losing her
I will sing an ode to Figaro
oh in the matter of time it takes to be losing her
I’ll dance Juliet and Romeo
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11. |
Ever Mine
07:34
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They came and they laid a gold train around me
And I stayed like iron scrap down by the foundry
Later that season
they redrew the boundary
Were they ever mine?
Were they ever mine?
East end, a playground, a bleak winter afternoon
He said I speed like a greyhound, chasing my red balloon
Evening…the fog came,
maybe I gave up much too soon
But was it ever mine?
Was it ever mine?
Some say the oldest passion play is written from the end
Every first greeting is “goodbye, again”
And in the garden scene off-stage,
they meet as two old friends,
slowly diluting in the frozen rain:
“Oleander and Absinthe in Spain”
So he keeps his temper and I keep my body clean
He reads Ezekiel while I paint in grenadine
Though some things may never
be anything they ever seem
This is ever mine
This is ever mine
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Emily Bezar
Singer, composer and keyboardist
Emily Bezar creates intricate, uncategorizable music, drawing freely from classical, jazz, rock, pop and electronic genres to create an enchanting, dynamic sound world.
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