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Four Walls Bending

by Emily Bezar

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Sven B. Schreiber (sbs)
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Sven B. Schreiber (sbs) This might be my favorite Emily Bezar album out of the three I've purchased so far... well, it's hard to decide, because there's no such thing like a poor or mediocre album of her's in the first place. It's an exciting whole rather than a sequence of ten separare tracks, with a mesmerizing spirit of beauty flowing through the entire 56-minute opus. What an overwhelming labor of love! Favorite track: Lead.
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1.
Velvet Eye 07:40
worst case: he’s a chain-letter lie with the war-room stare of a foreign spy me, the west face of a mountain in rain a Florida key in a hurricane I used to think I’d choose my time to die but like a flame thrown to a blackened sky I fell in to his velvet eye de oh derange me again send this blind woman sight ‘til then de oh derange me again hey hey again the first place that I look for me when the light is gone and I cannot see is my hand there from his neck to toe but I find his face and I can’t let go it’s his game to lose, no chance to tie but I’m ready for our last goodbye if he’ll meet me in his velvet eye de oh derange me again send this blind woman sight ‘til then de oh derange me again hey hey again hail of the light throne of the river tell me how the retina feels
2.
Kingdom Come 05:06
he said that always was better than nothing said it always would be that way said I always could find his shadow somewhere down the waterway but I knew I would never find it and I knew he’d be on the run and I knew he’d arrive faster if he had a better gun he said they offer a fast recovery said it sting like a broken chain well, I’m afraid of the feeling so slip me down some novocaine and it would be a shame to lose him for less than infernal crime but God don’t let me confuse him he is his and I am mine kingdom come, kingdom go turn the lever and may we meet again when time is slow angels fall, but never fall fall together… and I am no little domino he said that always was better than nothing said it always would be that way said I always could find his shadow somewhere down the waterway but tell me what would a life be after everything here was won? I bet it’s the same old chapter different mother, different son kingdom come, kingdom go turn the lever and may we meet again when time is slow angels fall, but do they fall fall forever… to greet the devil in the snow?
3.
keep him away from the TV hide all the nails in the room leave on the light by the door just in case he’s looking for you say what you will, anything, nothing I’ll still walk him to the end of the line soon you will be a mother, a father and I think you’ll know my mind somebody help me I am a fool for the little guy all my intention... would I? would I? would I? could I? as the engine falls, as the engine falls we stay inside with trains barricade the dolls a tumbleweed in flames...I see bocci balls four walls bending, four walls bending four walls bending in the squall chains fall off of our lives but I am stalling tangled, tethered till they put me down years I thought I’d lost, maybe forever they all seem like hours to me now if whole cities were to go underwater I could drain them, I would turn the tide so I’ll call the plane, with any luck he’ll veer toward the other side somebody help me I am a fool for the little guy all my intention... would I? would I? would I? could I? as the engine falls, as the engine falls we stay inside with trains barricade the dolls a tumbleweed in flames...I see bocci balls four walls bending, four walls bending four walls bending in the squall I’ll stay with you here while they irradiate the atmosphere won’t fade away, won’t fade away
4.
Lead 04:43
this is the room, this is the chair this is the wire holding me there one man leans to the left a little one arm on me and I’m the middle ground thrown to the fire, blade to the flame and in a moment we knew his name oh on this day another life is given and I am thankful that I could hear the sound who has not said ‘oh I could run away while they are in bed?’ (tell everyone I’ve been found dead) but as the moon is full of morning grey my silk slippers turn to lead hide the words I wrote that he never read sinking through the floor, Ballet Russe in my head for all that you say, all that you do you may look away when he first looks at you I have no more than a life to give him I have only the truth that I have found keep me awake, keep me alive give me a height I can still dive oh I am changing but I’m still with you I am more than the things to which I’m bound who has not said ‘oh I could run away while they are in bed?’ (tell everyone I’ve been found dead) but as the moon is full of morning grey my silk slippers turn to lead hide the words I wrote that he never read sinking through the floor, Ballet Russe in my head woke up bright, it was a sunny day all the things I love were a featherweight away when it’s right I want to stay oh in the fight, eye of the riddle grain of the wood, wood that I whittle oh if you love me just a little help this broken dancer sway hold me now oh hold me now and take this weight away
5.
daylight find me in the corner of my room daylight trace me with the filigree of noon from your courtyard oh please come in, come in soon for I am young and I have colors to reflect for you daylight fade me into the color of his car from my balcony I can see to where they are in my gold days I might bleed but I won’t scar now, I’m young and I have tragedy to spend on you so my God will you open wide? I have things to put inside if I wither in your dark rays what I have here won’t burn away make a map around my eyes make a map around my eyes so I might free them daylight find me in the corner of my room daylight trace me with the filigree of noon
6.
Sigh 06:07
all the cries and the laughter all the rules that we made all the birds in the rafters one by one, they flew away all the rhymes that I borrowed all the dreams counted on I woke up for tomorrow but didn’t find it, it was gone I am free, I lie here and I feel no shame but I know if someone calls me I won’t give my name I’m the shade at the border of his lightning spray we were crawling forever ‘til he ran away I know I’ll go over the ending in black and grey I go so slow was I only pretending to feel that way? like a sylph in the forest I could change in his hand but there was something about him I could never understand now I’ve left him with forever but he just leaves me one day and the things I said... I never meant, meant to say I know I’ll go over the ending in black and grey I go so slow was I only pretending to feel that way? sigh, my love for the moon over the hill is red and gone shame on us for believing in yesterday’s song
7.
Maybe So 04:41
let her go, let her go she has turned certainly to maybe so a short goodbye to this old show is better than losing her long and slow autumn rain and winter snow will clean the love, freeze the pain you’d never know… let her go, and she will stay in your mind like the first green of May what you see here will have to do like the way that she first enchanted you you may fall again some day you’ll be needing all those things she took away but hold on, before she leaves there is something you should know about beautiful thieves: she’s a short curve on a long scroll... I still remember the words he stole let her go, let her go she has turned certainly to maybe so
8.
Black Sand 06:45
some rusted coins and a bottle of broken green glass near the ocean the water flowed to the edge of the world from here and on the level sea summer ‘74 was floating to the surface it was cold and clear from where I stand, I see nothing but blue and sky and two birds flying it’s you and I in the space of a thousand years and what will we call it then? will we call it love like we did the evening Saturn reappeared? like every fever must break before the hallucination can, I have a reason to stay where I am shade me and leave me here with my lucky hand wade me in but let me down where I can stand fly away while you still can and ‘til the and ‘til the water away with me and ‘til the and ‘til the water away with me I will be here in the hot black sand it is not far it is not too hard to find the beach I'm on I am a shell and I will be the one you take to your ear whatever followed you to the shore that night, well you can be certain it's now gone, my dear like every dreamer who asks ‘where does the end of time begin?’ you can always find me right there breaking in oh shade me and leave me here with my lucky hand wade me in but let me down where I can stand fly away while you still can and ‘til the and ‘til the water away with me and ‘til the and ‘til the water away with me I will be here in the hot black sand all the love, all the rage all the lines on the page I believe I have paid for what I feel and how I feel it overcome, overlaid and so I wait for the day this wave washes me away (on this beach do you wanna hold my hand do you wanna lie with me baby in the black sand we can lie here ‘til the warning tide) fly away while you still can and ‘til the and ‘til the water away with me and ‘til the and ‘til the water away with me I will be here in the hot black sand
9.
Rondo 04:49
I like the way he breathes as he plays and I like the sound of wheels going ‘round we have a pact: ‘mama my friend will you still love me if I am late when that wall it does bend?’ ah ah ah ah ah ah ah I like the days better than the nights they say it's a phase so I won't fight… we had a plan to stay on the green now he walks through roses and I get the thorn in me in the loom where my new yarn is tied I weave us old and reading he prettier than I in the morning fireflies burn out oh but I know that we will shine la la la la la la la la la la
10.
they walk over the skyway onto the far court and the flag says it’s a windy day balls fly over the sideline torpedo sunshine getting nearer as I watch him play I have nothing for his everything and together we wax and we wane he’ll be offered all the world to sing oh oh oh never lock it away he climbs into the slow boat and through the rocky bay we’re out into the open sea we row over to Iceland and he’s a Viking sailor but I, again, am only me I have nothing for his everything and together we wax and we wane he’ll be offered all the world to sing oh oh oh never lock it away down the road a way he’ll grab the tetherline and stay anchored in his ordinary room rocks and beetle wings and all the little things remember life this way may he always stray... I have nothing for his everything and together we wax and we wane he’ll be offered all the world to sing oh oh oh never lock it away

about

This is modern classical vocal music performed by a rock band that speaks fluent jazz. Emily's kaleidoscopic sound is honest and true, full of passion, elegance, conflict and order with an emotional range and lyricism rarely heard in pop.

Song movements collide and split in waves and sheets of sounds. Angles appear from nowhere and dissolve into curves before they cut the air. Emily's gorgeously warm electronic keyboards weave a smoky, liquid psychedelia around her lush voice. From the majestic guitar screams of "Velvet Eye" to the pulsing keyboard hypnotics of "His Everything," she has created an opulent tapestry of sound.

credits

released October 1, 1999

Written and Produced by Emily Bezar
all music and lyrics ©1999, Blue Countess Music, BMI

Emily Bezar: vocals, piano, keyboards and sound programming
Morris Acevedo: guitar
Andrew Higgins: bass, cello samples on Track 4
Steve Rossi: drums
Michael Ross: guitar loops on Tracks 5 and 10

Recorded and Mixed by Justin Phelps
at Coast Recorders, San Francisco, CA
assisted by Mike Houge, Jamie Durr,
Yoko Kato, Dan Supko and Mark Fassler
Additional production on Tracks 4 and 5
by Justin Phelps and Andrew Higgins
Acoustic piano recorded by Tony Mills
at Spark Studios, Emeryville, CA

Mastered by Paul "Wintergreen" Stubblebine at Paul Stubblebine Mastering, San Francisco, CA

Photography by Christina Shook
Architectural photos of Frank Lloyd Wright's Marin County Civic Center, San Rafael, CA by Joe Atkinson, used by permission
Art Design by Emily Bezar

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Emily Bezar

Singer, composer and keyboardist
Emily Bezar creates intricate, uncategorizable music, drawing freely from classical, jazz, rock, pop and electronic genres to create an enchanting, dynamic sound world.

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